During my first year of engineering, a senior named Amar, from the Computer Science department, pulled me up for ragging. He engaged me in a long, pointless debate, obviously looking for clever repartee. At the end of ten minutes, his eyes already scanning the rows of other first-year girls behind me, he said,
“Nee vicharicha athreyum illallo…”
You are not as smart as I’d thought.
More than 6 years later, the memory of it still stings.
Sometimes, I feel I am like last year’s Diwali firecrackers. They show a lot of promise – make a lot of noise… whizz and spit… but in a few seconds, they splutter and die. The onlookers are not terribly let down – just mildly surprised.
“Oh,” they say, “I thought it had more going for it!”
Like when you bite into a puffed-up kachori and your teeth snap on air because somehow, you thought it had a mash filling. But it’s just empty. Puffed-up, but empty.
Perhaps now is my turn to be mildly surprised.